Prayer Request

I just spoke with Elise, the other girl who was going to Serbia, and the Lord has made it clear to her that she should not go this year. While I am sad that she won't be there, I am also glad that she is following the leadings of the Spirit. She wanted to be there more than anything, and for her to step down is a big step. 

I don't know what this means for me, however. I am now the only girl going, and I don't know how that will work, or even if it will. I might just live with a family for a while before finding roommates, or something else could happen, I just don't know. Please pray with me for guidance and wisdom in this. And pray for Elise as she figures out what she will do this year and that the Lord would comfort her in her decision. Pray that the people in charge of STINTers will make wise choices, and that everything would work out according to God's plan. 

If this isn't where God wants me, I am confidant that He will make my way straight and let me be ok with where I am. My dad is taking this hard, he sees it as another reason not to trust people, rather than another way to trust in God to take care of our needs. I am praying that he will be able to see my sense of calm with this and see the peace I have with it, and realize that it's not naivete that is fueling it, but peace in knowing that God is in control and will work everything together to achieve His will. At this point, I just have to let go and let God. 

What I've Realized

I've realized lately that I am far from the person that I want to be. I lose track of time, lose contact with friends, and am not everything that I think I am. We all hope that we are there for the people that we love, but in all honesty we can't always be. We all fall short, and all we can ask for is forgiveness. I know that I have let people down over the years, I have hurt people, and I have not been the person I should have been. I humbly ask for forgiveness and pray that the time we have all spent together can be looked upon fondly. Especially at this time when I am leaving NY and going through so many transitions, I am realizing that I have slacked in a lot of things, and have not made the best use of my time. It is easy to say that there is always tomorrow, but that's not always true. 

For those who have moved on before, the last couple years, I am sorry that I haven't kept in better touch. I really do value your friendship, and I'm sorry I haven't shown that more. 

For those that I am preparing to leave now, I love you all and am sorry that there hasn't been time to spend with each of you. I let life get in my way more times than I want to admit, and I am sorry for not being around more. 

All in all, I urge each of you to use the time you have to its fullest, treasure your friends, and live every day as if you would never see anyone again. The days that we have are few and in the big scope of things, our lives are a quick second in history. Spend it wisely. For those of you whom I may not see again, take care, and may God be with you, I will keep you in my prayers. 

How great is our God!

A friend and I went out last night to the drive-in theater around here, a double feature of recently released movies (Wall-E and The Hulk) for only $7, uum, YES. Well, we stayed a bit later after the movie, about an hour late, and just laid in her truck bed and looked at the stars for a while. It was so clear and beautiful, I have never seen so many stars in my life! We could even see the Milky Way! 

When we got to talking, I was just so in awe of how big our God is. He made every star, placed them where they still sit today, breathed the stars into being! 

By the word of the LORD were the heavens made, their starry host by the breath of his mouth.Psalm 33:6

Our God is a star-breather! He placed the stars in the sky for His good pleasure, and yet He still looks upon us with love and compassion! How awesome is He that as He holds us next to a star, the sun of some other solar system, he treasures us more! What we look at in awe is nothing compared to us in God's eyes. He died for us, not for a star, not for all the stars, but for each and every one of us as individuals. And not only that, but our God, the star-breather, came back from the grave so that we could live with Him eternally! Each of those stars will one day burn out, and die, and that's the end for them. But for those who believe upon the name of Jesus, those He will save and give everlasting life! And we look at the stars, in awe of their beauty? Our Heavenly Father made us even more beautiful to Himself. 

Last night I thought of how beautiful the night sky must be to God, to see it all in its entirety, be able to zoom in, see close up, and see the whole sky as well. But the more I think about it, the more I realize that He takes just as much, and more, joy in knowing us and our hearts. We ought to look at each other as we do the stars, as beautiful works or a marvelous Creator, who are loved beyond anything in the sky. He knows their names, but He knows our names, the numbers of hairs on our heads, the number of our days, and the plans that He has for each of us. Now how great is our God, truly. 

Quick 3am update

Just a quick note, I sent out some letters last week and will be sending some more this week, and I am following up each letter with a phone call. Please pray that God will work in the hearts of these people to give and to think of friends that I could contact. Please also pray for me.  I am finding myself getting very nervous before each call. I know that God is in control and will give me the strength for each call. I am trusting in God to provide everything that I need, but sometimes I wish I could just trust and it would happen without me having to do anything. So I just ask that God would remove my anxiety over everything. I know that He will do it. 

Our God is so good. So so good!